In the Thick of Holy Week

Here we are in the middle of Holy Week. What are we doing in the Amen household to keep this week holy?

This year, our parish mission was an Unplug & Reconnect week. It was a fantastic theme and one sorely needed by me and my family. It was a great chance to spend time together as a family and a church family getting to know each other. Even better was the unseasonably warm weather we experienced that week. It can be hard in Michigan to find something to do in mid-March other than watch tv, play on the internet, or get out with the good old game system. Thankfully that wasn't a concern this March. We've had warm sunny days that allowed us to go outside and enjoy the new backyard. We spent mire time in prayer, more time talking to one another, and more time reconnecting with each other.

I am unplugging from tv again this week. I have to admit, there was a time in my life where, though I do have other interests, nothing much interested me besides watching tv. I needed the time to zone out, not having a single thought in my head. I've found, however, that over the last few months I would much rather spend my evenings doing other things. Honestly, laundry is almost more enticing than tv watching. There's nothing worth watching and very little that will actually build me up rather than drag me down. It really hit home when our priest was over on Saturday evening to bless the new house. As he went from room to room dousing the place in holy water, he also blessed our tv sets. I was surprised, but as he did it he said "bless this tv, that nothing harmful or damaging may be shown on it." Wow. Yea, nothing harmful or damaging. And there it was, smacking me right in the forehead. Don't let this boob-tube get in the way of our relationship with God. Don't let its influence in our home be greater than God's. Don't get drawn away from Him by the garbage of this world. This world doesn't love me and my dear family like He does. If my mind needs a rest, let it rest in Him.

So, there I was, staring down the barrel of a very exciting Holy Week and God is telling me to turn off the tv.

You've got it, Lord.

Now, before I leave you, a quick update. Baby Amen #5 is doing fantastic. We had our 20 week ultrasound last week and saw the baby yawning. Yawning. Who would've thought a yawn could bring tears to my eyes? We also peeked at Mr. Amen's insistence. I thought it was pretty pointless to peek since I felt certain the baby was a girl. Just goes to show...I am a trustworthy source. We confirmed we are expecting a little girl. We also got to see her in 3D/4D, which was much less creepy than I imagined, but she hid her little face from us...so what she looks like will remain a mystery for now.

Here's Baby Amen #5 in all her 3D/4D glory.

Here's my 20 week belly in my Easter dress. Even though I've gained less than 5 pounds so far, I think my belly looks like I've gained much more. It's actually looking like it did around the 32-34 week mark with Junior. Sew and I are due on almost the same day...and she's mentioned her growing belly a time or two, but I think I'm giving her some good competition.

The Amen Family - How It All Started (Part V)

If you thought there wasn’t much more to the story, you’re assessment would have been incorrect.

After our Thanksgiving “proposal”, we started talking about a September or October wedding.  We hadn’t firmed up any dates when Mr. Amen found out his company would be laying off his entire department anytime between March 1 and June 1.  That presented a very real problem for us.  Mr. Amen was in the US on a work visa sponsored by his company.  If he was no longer with the company he would have 30 days to leave the US.

We would have to get married much sooner than anticipated or risk him being forced out of the country.  If forced out, we would have to apply for a “fiancé visa” which would allow him to enter the country for the purpose of getting married.  Once grated, we would have a very short window of time during which to marry.  Then, once married, we would begin the long paperwork process to get him an Emp.loyment Auth.orization Doc.ument so he could work, and even longer to get a “greencard.”  When I returned to work after getting engaged, all the ladies asked when we were getting married.  They were shocked by the answer and suspected I was pregnant (ummm…NO!).

Three weeks after our official engagement, we were legally married.  Only 8 people other than us and the mayor were at that ceremony (my mom, dad, sister, brother and sister-in-law, Mr. Amen’s mom and aunt, and his best man). 

Immediately we began all the immigration paperwork to get his greencard and we received it in record time!  The actual immigration interview was not at all like in the movies.  We were super nervous and thought that we might be at a disadvantage going into the interview because we hadn’t lived together.  In reality, the interview was pretty short, they asked how we met, about our wedding, asked to see pictures of the wedding and asked us to identify the people in the pictures.  The “defining moment” came when the interviewer asked Mr. Amen for my birthdate.  I snapped my head to look at him with a look on my face that said, “You better get this right.”  That was what she wanted to see…that head snap told her that we were a real couple.

We explained the situation to the Deacon that was to officiate our church wedding; he was very understanding and said this type of thing happened all the time.

That Memorial Day weekend I traveled to Oklahoma to pack up Mr. Amen’s apartment and move him up to Michigan.  He was laid off from his company on June 1^st.  He moved right into the apartment where we would live after we were really married in God’s eyes.  Our wedding went off, without a hitch on June 30, 2007.

And, that, my friends, is how the Amen Family started.

The Amen Family - How It All Started (Part III)

The following Monday evening, I was sitting with Grace again in the front row of the lecture hall for our Graduate Managerial Accounting class, when Mr. Amen walked in and sat directly across the semi-circle from me.  “Ugh, how am I supposed to concentrate in this class with that cute guy sitting right in front of me?”  I whined to Grace.  She just laughed.

The next night, I was sitting in the 4^th row of our Graduate Marketing class when he walked in and sat right in front of me.  Then, our professor asked us to form groups of 4 for that semester’s team project.  I paired up with the girl next to me; Mr. Amen paired up with the guy next to him; they turned around and we formed a group of four.  Finally, a perfect excuse to talk to him!

Our first conversation was a little tense.  We started talking and I asked him where he was from.  He told me his country’s name and asked me if I knew where it was.  I said I did.  He didn’t believe me.  He pulled out his daily planner that had a world map on the inside cover and asked me to point out his country on the map.  I quickly snatched the planner from his hands and pointed to his country.  He seemed surprised I had gotten it right.  Years later, Mr. Amen divulged that he too had noticed me right away, but refused to like me until he knew I was smart.  When I pointed his country out on that map, he allowed himself to like me.

Soon, we began hanging out outside of class with other friends.  One evening in late October, a group of friends had made plans to go to a haunted house for fun ahead of Halloween (what were we thinking?!).  At the last minute everyone backed out of the outing except Mr. Amen and me.  We ended up going together anyhow and had a fun time together.  We picked up dinner on our way back and watched a movie at my apartment.  It was our first unofficial “date”.

He asked me out for the following weekend on a real date.  We were going to the movies.  We planned on seeing a Br.ad Pi.tt movie, Se.ven Yea,rs in Tib.et, but when we got to the theatre it wasn’t showing there.  We had gone to the wrong theatre.  So we decided to see Br.ad Pi.tt in Fig.ht Cl.ub instead.  Not exactly a first date movie, but that’s what we saw.  After the movie we stopped at So.nic for a bite to eat.  Mr. Amen’s car wouldn’t start when we tried to leave.  We had to get some guys to help him push it so I could pop the clutch to start the engine.  After a quick detour to his uncle’s house to pick up a different vehicle, he took me home.  As he dropped me off he asked me out again.  He was surprised I was willing to take the chance on seeing him again after the car trouble.  Really?!?!  I would have gladly jumped in the fiery furnace with Shadrach, Meshach and Abednego for the chance to go out with him again. J

That’s how we began our dating relationship…next I’ll tell you about the proposal.

The Amen Family - How It All Started (Part II)

Around the same time I was getting ready to move to OK, Mr. Amen was finishing up his undergraduate college experience as well.  He is from Latin America originally and had never thought of moving to the US.  His future plans included graduate school at a university in Chile.  His uncle lived in Tulsa and had invited him to come up for a semester to study at the En.glish Lan.guage Ins.titute (ELI) at O.RU.  He could stay with his uncle, use his uncle’s car and improve his English language skills.  Mr. Amen’s mother encouraged him to come to Tulsa, so he did.

He arrived in Tulsa in January 1999 and started attending O.RU’s E.LI.  His English was already light-years ahead of his classmates.  The professors encouraged him to apply to the graduate school of business at O.RU for his MBA.  He thought, why not?  Mr. Amen took the GMAT, applied and was accepted.  He was set to begin classes in the fall semester 1999. 

Good thing he had no intention of staying in the US!

During the spring and summer semesters, I had some catching up to do in business courses.  I took more than a full load to complete the equivalent of an undergraduate major in business.  On the first day of classes in January 1999 I met a wonderful friend, “Grace”. Grace, her husband and her parents would become my surrogate family during my time in Tulsa. 

It was a Thursday, the evening of my first class in August 1999, and I was sitting in the front row of the lecture hall with Grace.  I was watching for another friend to arrive when I turned around and looked over my left shoulder toward the rear of the room.  That’s when I saw Mr. Amen.  He was leaning back in his chair, trying to look nonchalant.  He was wearing dress pants, a button down dress shirt with a sweater vest and a big, ugly grandpa tie.

“Who’s that cute guy over there?” I asked Grace quietly, nodding my head in his direction.

“I don’t know, must be new,” Grace answered.  “Go talk to him.”

“No way!  He’s way too cute to talk to,” my face must’ve turned 50 shades of red as I responded.

Yup, I was smitten.  From the very first moment I saw him.  Love at first sight.  Well, if not love, at least intense like!

The Amen Famiy - How It All Started (Part I)

When I was maybe 6 years old, my family went on a vacation to Broken Arrow, Oklahoma where Rh.ema Bi.ble Col.lege is located.  We were visiting some family friends who had moved down there to pursue a theology degree.  While we were there we drove over to Tulsa to see the campus of Or.al Ro.berts Uni.versity.  As we drove around the campus, we went across the street to the Ci.ty of Fai.th towers, the medical facility associated with the university.  The buildings shimmered from the gold reflective windows (very 70s chic); the water fountains danced in the hot Oklahoma sun; and there was a statue.  An enormous bronze statue of Praying Hands.

At over 60 feet tall, weighing over 30 tons, it was the largest bronze statue in the world.  A magnificent symbol of faith.  At that moment, I said to my parents, “one day I’m going to come here and go to college.”

I had graduated from college in May 1997 with a dual degree in French (language & literature) and was working at a smallish sized company doing a little of everything.  My social life was going well.  I had my family, many friends and many acquaintances.  There was always some fun to be had on the weekends and even during the week if I felt so inclined.  I was involved at my church playing keyboard during Sunday services and was active with the young adult ministry.  I wasn’t a partier (never have been), but I did have plenty of g and pg-rated experiences to keep life interesting.

By the summer of 1998, as a young adult navigating life beyond the safety of college, I was growing and changing in my worldview and my ideas about what I wanted out of life.  As I changed, my friends had difficulty embracing the new me.  They had trouble accepting that I was different even if it was for the better.  They couldn’t let me grow up and move on from the foolish things I had done as a younger version of myself.  They expected and wanted the same girl they always knew.

I couldn’t be her any longer.

I was restless.  I knew God was calling me out of my childhood home, away from my childhood friends, away from my family.  But where?

I was talking with a dear friend about his plans to go back to college.  He told me he was going to Or.al Ro.berts Uni.versity in the fall.  As soon as the words were out of his mouth, something clicked within me.  I knew that’s where I was supposed to go.  I had been taking some additional college courses during the spring and was thinking about studying to become a teacher.  My spring classes had been focused on a graduate degree in English Literature.  But something didn’t feel right during those studies.  I was feeling called to study business.

So I went online, found out what I would need to do to get into the MBA program at O.RU and started doing it.  A couple weeks later I took the G.MA.T exam.  My score on the G.MA.T combined with my undergraduate GPA would allow me to get into any, but the most elite, school.  I knew it had to be O.RU.  Within two months I had been accepted into the graduate business program at O.RU and left on an apartment hunting trip.

Everything was falling into place for my big move.  It was certainly scary to think about leaving everything I knew and moving a thousand miles across the country, away from my family, with no job, to a city where I knew exactly one person.  Despite all this, I had a total peace about what I was doing.

What was I doing? 

I thought I was going to graduate business school, thouht I was going to get my MBA with a concentration in Accounting.  I thought I was going to meet a wonderful Christian cowboy, marry him and live happily ever after on his ranch raising lots of cattle and children.

On December 26^th, 1998 I packed up most of my belongings and my parents and brother drove me to Tulsa.